Detox - the Master Cleanse Way

Your body is crawling with toxins: pesticides, hormones, prescription drugs, fertilizers, heavy metals, Richard Simmons and more. Much more.

Fortunately, there is a simple remedy: the Master Cleanse. Switch to a diet of lemonade, maple syrup, water and cayenne pepper.* Give it ten days, and the toxins will be driven from your system. Along with your significant others.

Let's face it: if it's good enough for Gwyneth Paltrow, it's good enough for you, pally.

* As Dave Barry might say, if he were still alive**: "I am not making this up!"
** We are aware that Dave Barry is still, technically, alive.***
*** You're right: "Dave Barry is still, technically, alive" would be a good name for a rock band.

Truly Next to God...liness

Sometimes it seems like no matter what you do, the bathroom never gets really clean. Some experts recommend ammonia, some recommend bleach. Why not try both?

Mix a healthy amount of equal parts ammonia and bleach in a bucket (be sure to close all doors and windows to maximize the grime fighting vapors) and apply to stubborn stains.

Be prepared for an explosion of clean!